• From Leftover Rice to Masala Rice: A Leadership Lesson on Resource Optimization

    Sundays are always when I want to have something special. My cook arrives in the afternoon. They take care of what needs to be made for lunch and dinner. Therefore, breakfast becomes my responsibility. Today being a Sunday, I was wondering what to make. I wanted something special. However, I didn’t want to spend too much time or effort in the kitchen.

    I opened the fridge and saw some leftover rice sitting there quietly. For a moment, I almost dismissed it. Leftover rice doesn’t exactly scream Sunday special. And yet, I paused.

    You can transform that same leftover rice with a few spices, some vegetables, and a bit of thought. It could turn into a really good masala rice. The result would be comforting, tasty, and satisfying. Nothing new had to be created. Nothing fancy had to be added. It just needed a different way of looking.

    As I started making it, I started connecting this to my leadership experience.

    What Resource Optimization Really Means

    In organisations, we often look for something new to solve our challenges. It could be new hires, new initiatives, new budgets. Meanwhile, existing people, skills, and processes sit quietly in the background, much like that leftover rice, underutilised and overlooked.

    Resource optimization isn’t about doing more with less at the cost of people. It’s about respecting what already exists and asking ourselves of how can we use this differently.

    This is precisely why building a strong leadership pipeline matters. When organisations invest in development through tools like Development Centres, they also invest in coaching. They use targeted stretch assignments. As a result, they stop seeing people as fixed. Instead, they start seeing them as a work in progress. Capabilities are identified early, potential is nurtured, and readiness is built over time.

    Good leaders don’t immediately reach outside. They first look inward – developing what they already have before searching for something new.

    Seeing Value Before Asking for More

    In the kitchen, you don’t cook fresh rice when perfectly good leftovers are already there. In leadership, however, we often rush to add resources before fully understanding the ones we have.

    Strong leaders pause to look for hidden strengths in their teams. They identify cross-skilling opportunities. They find transferable capabilities and experience that hasn’t been fully leveraged.

    I’ve often seen individuals labelled “average” suddenly flourish when a leader simply recognised and repositioned their strengths. The capability was always there – it just needed visibility. When leaders do this well, the impact is twofold. Organisations save the significant cost of hiring and training new talent. Employees feel seen, valued, and more engaged. What was once overlooked becomes a source of both performance and commitment.

    Reframing Instead of Replacing

    Leftover rice isn’t eaten plain; it’s transformed. In the same way, leadership isn’t always about replacing people, processes, or structures. It is often about reframing them with intent. Effective leaders step back before labelling something as outdated or ineffective. They examine what can be simplified. They also look at what can be repurposed and what can be combined. These deliberate, often understated shifts in thinking reduce complexity, improve execution, and create disproportionate business impact without adding new resources. Over time, this kind of thoughtful leadership becomes crucial. People feel valued. Effort is respected. Capability is nurtured. These elements become key factors in making organisations genuinely great places to work.

    The Same Resource, Different Outcome

    The same rice can become lemon rice, masala rice, or fried rice. The base remains unchanged; the outcome depends on the spices.

    In leadership, the “spices” are clarity, trust, psychological safety, and recognition. Many teams don’t underperform because they lack capability but they underperform because the conditions don’t allow them to thrive.

    Change the environment, and the outcome changes.

    Timing Matters

    Fresh rice doesn’t work for masala rice. In fact fresh rice will make the masala rice mushy. Cold rice works best.

    Leadership is similar. Not every person or idea is ready at the same time. Mature leaders understand readiness and timing. They know when to push, when to pause, and when to let something settle before taking it forward.

    Respecting What Has Gone Before

    Leftover rice represents yesterday’s effort. Someone planned it, cooked it, and stored it with care.

    In organisations too, dismissing past work, however imperfect it may be, can disengage people quickly. Good leaders acknowledge what has gone before, build on it, and involve others in making it better.

    The Recipe (Because This Is Leadership Spice)

    Heat some oil.
    Add mustard seeds, onions, tomatoes, peanuts, urad dal & curry leaves.
    Throw in whatever vegetables or leftovers you have.
    Add salt, asafoetida & turmeric
    Toss in the leftover cold rice.
    Finish with lemon and coriander.

    Nothing wasted.
    Nothing extra.
    Everything intentional.

    The Leadership Takeaway

    Leadership isn’t always about starting fresh.
    Often, it’s about seeing things differently.

    Before asking for more people, more money, or more time, pause and look at what you already have. With the right intent and a few thoughtful “spices,” even leftovers can turn into something special.

    Just like masala rice,
    the magic isn’t in the rice – it’s in how thoughtfully you choose to use it.

  • A Sweet Start: New Year, Leadership, and the Rasgulla Effect

    Happy New Year to all of you! I hope this year brings you joy, growth, and moments of deep reflection. My new year began in a very meaningful way. I attended my Buddhism meeting on January 2nd. This day coincides with Daisaku Ikeda’s birthday. It’s a day when we renew our determination for practice. We reflect on the past year and set our intentions for the year ahead.

    Being in that space, surrounded by others committed to growth and transformation, made me think about change. It challenges us, reshapes us, and opens doors we didn’t even know existed.

    Daisaku Ikeda said, “Human beings aren’t defeated by adversity. They are defeated by themselves – by giving up and abandoning their own convictions.”

    This quote has guided me through my personal transformation. Over the years, chanting, study, and active engagement in my community have shown me that true change begins within. I have noticed shifts in how I respond to challenges, relate to people, and lead initiatives. Some changes were subtle, almost invisible at first, while others were more dramatic. What I have learned is that change is both deeply personal and profoundly gradual.

    The Challenge of New Year Resolutions

    We are all familiar with the tradition of New Year resolutions. We make them each year, but most of us fail or give up. We promise ourselves we will exercise more, eat better, be calmer, delegate more, or think more strategically. And yet, despite the best intentions, these resolutions often fade within weeks. This isn’t about lacking willpower. It’s about the unseen forces within us that resist change. These forces can make us give up and abandon our own convictions, just as Daisaku Ikeda reminds us. A few years ago, I read Immunity to Change by Robert Kegan and Lisa Lahey. This book remains one of my favorites. It helped me understand these hidden forces even more deeply and why real change often feels so difficult.

    Introducing Immunity to Change

    Immunity to Change, a concept developed by Robert Kegan and Lisa Lahey, is so relevant. It offers a profound lens to understand why real change often feels so difficult. The book introduces the concept of the Immunity Map. This map helps uncover the hidden commitments. It also reveals the deep-seated assumptions that drive our behaviors. It shows that beneath every counterproductive action lies a competing commitment. This commitment is a belief or fear we may not even be aware of. Behind that, there are big assumptions about ourselves, others, or the world that make these commitments feel necessary. By making these invisible forces visible, we begin to understand why change is so challenging. We also discover how we unconsciously sabotage our own efforts. This insight turns change into a deliberate process. It allows us to experiment with new ways of thinking and acting. These experiments gradually weaken the “immune system” that guards old patterns. They open the door to meaningful and lasting transformation.

    This aligns very closely with my leadership approach. I use the SPICE™ framework which consists of Self-awareness, Presence, Influence, Clarity, and Evolution. According to me, change is not just a single action, but an integration of insight, behaviour, and mindset. Often, what feels like resistance is actually a protective mechanism. It acts as an internal immune system safeguarding old habits or beliefs. These habits or beliefs once served us.

    Personal Coaching Insights

    In my coaching and personal reflection, I’ve seen this firsthand. A young leader once received feedback that she was very autocratic. As we explored this together, we uncovered a deeper fear. She had a concern. As a woman in a leadership role, she worried. She feared being taken advantage of if she didn’t assert control. Her autocratic style was, in essence, a protective mechanism. Once she recognized this inner assumption and fear, she was able to consciously shift her approach. Over time, she became more inclusive and collaborative, and the feedback she received changed accordingly.

    The Immunity Map and SPICE™ Framework

    The Immunity Map makes these hidden dynamics visible. It identifies improvement goals, behaviours that undermine them, hidden competing commitments, and the deep assumptions behind them. Once surfaced, leaders can test assumptions, adjust behaviours, and allow authentic change to emerge. In SPICE™ language, this journey begins with Self-awareness. We notice what drives us. It flows into Presence. We stay with discomfort. It moves into Influence. We reshape impact without force. It deepens with Clarity. We see what truly matters. Finally, it unfolds as Evolution. This is a continuous process of becoming.

    Real Change as a Heat Experience

    Real change is a heat experience, as Kegan and Lahey describe in their book. Just as raw ingredients transform through cooking, intentions and habits transform when we allow time, reflection, and careful effort. Trying to force change too quickly often leads to burn-out or retreat. True transformation happens slowly, as insight, awareness, and action integrate.

    The Transformational Recipe: Rasgulla – From Raw to Remarkable

    Think of making rasgulla, the classic Indian dessert. In its raw form, chenna (curdled milk solids) is soft, crumbly, and bland. It feels incomplete, unformed, and almost unpalatable. As you gently shape the chenna into balls and boil them in sugar syrup, something magical happens. The heat causes the balls to expand, absorb sweetness, and become spongy. With patience and careful attention, the raw elements slowly transform. They become soft, juicy rasgullas, rich with flavor. They are unrecognizable from their starting form.

    Change in leadership works the same way. Raw intentions, our resolutions, habits, or growth goals – may feel awkward, uncomfortable, or incomplete at first. We need the slow heat of self-reflection. Adding mindful practice and consistent effort helps these raw intentions. They then absorb the sweetness of insight. This growth expands into meaningful, sustainable change.

    The SPICE™ process guides the transformation. Self-awareness lets us recognize what truly matters. Presence keeps us engaged and grounded in each moment. Influence shapes how our growth affects others. Clarity helps us refine our actions. Evolution marks the emergence of meaningful, sustainable change.

    Leadership intentions need patience and gentle care. Like a rasgulla that swells and absorbs syrup over time, they reach their full flavor and form gradually.

    Stepwise Rasgulla Recipe – From Raw to Remarkable

    Ingredients:

    • 1 liter full-fat milk
    • 2 tablespoons lemon juice or vinegar
    • 1 cup sugar
    • 4 cups water
    • 1 teaspoon rose water (optional)

    Step 1: Making the Chenna (Curdled Milk)
    Bring the milk to a gentle boil. Reduce heat and add lemon juice slowly, stirring gently until the milk separates into curds (chenna) and whey. Turn off the heat. Just as the milk separates, your raw intentions begin to take form. This is the stage of self-awareness – noticing your goals, desires, and fears, even if they feel separate or unfinished.


    Step 2: Draining and Kneading
    Strain the curds through a muslin cloth. Rinse with cold water to remove any lemon taste. Squeeze out excess water and knead the chenna until smooth and soft. This may take 8–10 minutes.
    Kneading the chenna mirrors the work of presence – being fully attentive to your thoughts, habits, and patterns. Each fold and press refines your intentions, smoothing out resistance and shaping them with mindful effort.

    Step 3: Shaping the Balls
    Divide the kneaded chenna into small portions and roll them into smooth balls without cracks.
    This is clarity – the stage where ideas and intentions take visible form. Each ball represents a goal or habit you are consciously committing to – distinct, tangible, and ready to be nurtured.

    Step 4: Preparing the Sugar Syrup
    In a deep pan, combine water and sugar. Bring to a boil and let the syrup simmer for 5 minutes. Add rose water if using. Just as the chenna absorbs the syrup, our intentions are shaped by the influences around us. Mentors, peers, experiences, and guidance add depth, resilience, and sweetness to what we are becoming.

    Step 5: Cooking the Rasgullas
    Gently drop the chenna balls into the boiling sugar syrup. Cover and simmer for 15–20 minutes. The balls will expand as they absorb the syrup and transform completely. Heat and consistent effort bring transformation. This is evolution. Challenges, reflection, and sustained practice expand your abilities, just like the chenna balls absorb sweetness.

    Serve this chilled and enjoy!!

    This year, I invite you to pick one meaningful change. Instead of a long list of resolutions, explore the immunity that surrounds this change. Honour what your old habits have protected, experiment gently, and observe the transformation. Chenna becomes delicious rasgulla through patient cooking. Similarly, your intentions can become real and lasting change. This requires awareness, patience, and persistence.

  • What a Christmas Cake Taught Me About Leadership

    Wow, Christmas is here!! For me, this festive season is all about joy and cheer, decorations and Christmas cake. For years, I watched Christmas cakes being made long before Christmas arrived.

    The Christmas cake mixing ceremony marks the beginning of the festive season. It is rooted in tradition, togetherness, and shared intention. Families, friends, or colleagues come together to mix dried fruits, spices, and spirits. Each person takes a turn to stir the mixture. This often happens while making a wish. More than a culinary ritual, it celebrates collaboration and patience. The ceremony embodies the belief that when many hands and hearts contribute, the final outcome is richer and more meaningful. The fruits are soaked quietly and kept aside. The mixing is slow and deliberate. The baking takes hours, not minutes. And even after the cake is done, it is fed patiently, week after week.

    A few months back, I witnessed this ceremony. As I watched the bowl being passed around, it struck me how closely this ritual mirrors leadership in action. A great outcome is not the result of a single person’s effort. It emerges from shared ownership and diverse contributions. It also requires the patience to let things mature over time. Leadership outcomes resemble the Christmas cake. They deepen in value when people are invited to participate. The process gains clarity when intentions are clear. We trust the process rather than rush the result. Not in the spotlight. Not in grand moments. But in what is done early, consistently, and with care.

    Great leadership, like soaked fruit, needs time to mature before it can truly enrich

    The most important step in a Christmas cake happens when no one is thinking about celebration. Fruits are soaked months or at times a year in advance. Alcohol slowly penetrates each piece, softening it, deepening it, changing it from within.

    Skip this step, and no amount of decoration can save the cake.

    This is where leadership truly begins.

    I’ve seen leaders who want engagement without trust, performance without preparation, results without relationships. Everything looks fine on the outside, but it doesn’t stay with people. Great leaders understand that impact is created quietly, long before it’s visible. They soak their teams in clarity, belief, and opportunity, so when the moment comes, the flavour is unmistakable.

    I once worked with a business head who was widely admired during stable times. Articulate. Decisive. Confident. But when the organisation went through a sudden restructuring, something changed. Trust eroded quickly. People became cautious. Conversations shut down.

    What became visible was not the crisis but the lack of prior investment. Feedback had been transactional. Relationships were conditional. Culture had never been soaked.

    In contrast, another leader I worked with barely spoke in townhalls. However, they spent years having quiet, honest conversations. They engaged in these conversations even when they were uncomfortable. When pressure hit, the team stood together instinctively.

    These are the soaked fruits of leadership. When pressure comes, leaders don’t rise to the occasion. They fall back on what they prepared.

    Mixing the Flour: Structure Without Suffocation

    Flour gives the cake its body. Too little can make it runny and too much makes it heavy and flat. Not only the quantity but equally important is the way it is mixed as overmixing ruins the texture.

    This reminds me of some the leaders I have seen struggling. They demand results the way some people cook in a hurry, constant stirring, constant checking, constant pressure. They turn up the flame and hope for the best. Everything is tightly controlled. Instructions are clear. Effort is visible. Yet something essential is missing. The team complies, but they don’t rise.

    Great leaders understand what good bakers know: structure is necessary, but interference is costly. Once the ingredients are aligned, you mix just enough – and then you stop. You allow space for the batter to settle, for air to do its work.

    Some leaders mistake freedom for the absence of structure. Others believe control guarantees results. Both miss the point. Strong leadership provides clarity, boundaries, and priorities so people feel secure. Then it eases its grip, trusting capability to take form.

    The best leaders don’t keep stirring. They know when to step back. They let the work rise. They trust the mix.

    The Spices: Small Behaviours That Define the Flavour

    No single spice defines a Christmas cake. It is the balance of cinnamon, cloves, nutmeg, ginger. Each subtle, each essential.

    Leadership works the same way.

    Over years of assessing and debriefing leaders, I have noticed a pattern. It is rarely the strategy that damages trust. It is the tone, the timing and, believe it or not – the silence. A raised eyebrow. A hurried response to a genuine concern.

    Leadership flavour is created in small moments:

    • How a leader listens when someone hesitates
    • Whether feedback carries curiosity or judgement
    • How mistakes are handled publicly and privately
    • Who is acknowledged when outcomes are positive

    One overpowering behaviour like control, impatience or ego, can dominate everything else.

    People may forget what you said in a townhall. They never forget how you showed up when it mattered.

    Baking Time: Why Leadership Cannot Be Rushed

    A Christmas cake is baked slowly, at low heat. Increase the temperature and it may look done on the outside, but it remains raw inside.

    Leadership development follows the same law.

    I have seen organisations demand “ready-now leaders” without allowing people the time to learn, fail, reflect, and grow. The result is leadership that looks confident, but cracks under pressure.

    Depth takes time. There is no shortcut. Urgency may deliver speed. Patience delivers substance.

    Feeding the Cake: Leadership Is Never ‘Done’

    Even after baking, the cake needs attention. Small amounts of alcohol are added periodically to keep it moist and deepen flavour.

    Leadership relationships are no different.

    Trust fades without regular nourishment. The check-ins, appreciation, honest conversations, and presence. One-off initiatives don’t sustain engagement. Ongoing care does.

    Leaders who stop feeding the cake wonder later why their teams feel dry and disengaged.

    The Tradition Behind the Christmas Cake

    The Christmas cake began as a humble porridge meant to nourish through winter. Over centuries, it evolved into a rich cake made collectively. It was about families gathering, recipes passed down, patience honoured.

    At its heart, the tradition was never about indulgence. It was about continuity.

    Leadership, too, is an act of continuity. We inherit cultures, systems, and people – and leave them shaped by how we led.

    A Classic Christmas Cake Recipe

    Ingredients

    • 500 g mixed dried fruits (raisins, currants, sultanas)
    • 100 g mixed peel
    • 100 g glace cherries (chopped)
    • 120 ml rum or brandy
    • 250 g unsalted butter (softened)
    • 250 g brown sugar
    • 4 eggs
    • 250 g all-purpose flour
    • 1 tsp baking powder
    • 1 tsp cinnamon powder
    • ½ tsp nutmeg
    • pinch of grated ginger or ginger powder
    • ½ tsp clove powder
    • Zest of 1 orange
    • 1 tsp vanilla extract

    Method

    1. Soak fruits with alcohol at least a few months in advance.
    2. Cream butter and sugar until light.
    3. Add eggs one at a time.
    4. Fold in sifted flour, baking powder, and spices gently.
    5. Add soaked fruits, zest, and vanilla.
    6. Bake at 150°C for 2.5–3 hours.
    7. Cool and feed weekly if desired.

    Closing Reflection

    Though a Christmas cake is shared during celebration, it is shaped in solitude, patience, and care.

    Leadership is no different. It is built when no one is clapping. When decisions are inconvenient. When consistency matters more than charisma.

    So as you cut into a Christmas cake this season, pause for a moment and ask yourself:

    • What have I been soaking quietly this year?
    • Which spices do people associate with my leadership?
    • And what will remain when the heat is turned up?

    Because long after the decorations are gone, both cakes and leaders are remembered for one thing alone: Depth.

  • The Pinch of Salt: From Gajar ka Halwa to Leadership

    I’m back from Doha, one of my favourite cities. I love its modern, contemporary energy, but this time my joy had a far deeper reason. My two-year-old granddaughter, Azariah, lives there.

    Now that she’s talking in full sentences (and opinions), our time together felt different this visit. Every evening ended the same way: her climbing into my lap and demanding, “Daadi, story.”

    And so, story after story flowed. Some invented on the spot, some remembered, some reshaped with every telling. In the process, I found myself slipping back into my own childhood. Stories back then weren’t just entertainment. They were quiet carriers of values. I narrated many of the stories I had grown up hearing. Some had animals. Others featured princesses. I was drawn back to one from my own childhood: the story of a king and his three daughters.

    Halfway through, I realised something. This wasn’t just a bedtime story. It was a quiet reminder. Leadership, like food, draws its flavour from essentials we rarely talk about. Salt is one of them.

    The King and the three daughters

    You might be familiar with this story. It goes like this: a king asked his three daughters how much they loved him. The first two daughters gave grand answers, comparing their love to the world and the universe. The youngest daughter, however, was the king’s favorite. She said something unusual and unexpected. She told him she loved him as much as salt.

    The king was enraged and shocked. How could anyone love him as much as salt? In his frustration, he banished her. After a few years, she invited him for a lavish meal. She instructed the cooks not to add any salt to the food. As he tasted the food, the blandness struck him and he realized the depth of her words at that time. He asked for her forgiveness and all’s well that ends well.

    The Salt of Leadership

    How often do we confuse eloquence with depth? How often do we reward what sounds impressive rather than what is true?

    In leadership, we are frequently drawn to the visible spices – the big gestures, the confident articulation, the impressive strategies. They matter, of course. But without salt, even the most elaborate dish loses its essence. Salt is foundational. It enhances everything else. It brings out flavour rather than masking it. And yet, when it is right, it is barely noticed.

    Leadership has its own salt. It is truth spoken simply. It is self-awareness that grounds decisions. It is integrity that doesn’t need announcing. It is presence that steadies others, especially in uncertainty. Without these, leadership may look impressive, but it lacks substance. Teams feel it immediately. Something feels off. Flat. Unseasoned.

    Over the years, working with leaders across industries, I’ve seen this repeatedly. The leaders who create trust and followership are rarely the loudest in the room. They are the ones whose words align with actions. Who listen as deeply as they speak. Who don’t over-season their leadership with theatrics. That evening in Doha, I was sitting with a two-year-old who cared little for dramatic endings. The child cared a lot for authenticity. I was reminded of this simple truth: Leadership doesn’t need more complexity. It needs the right seasoning.

    In the Leadership Spice framework, salt represents the essentials. Self-awareness, truth, courage, and clarity. The quiet ingredients that don’t draw attention to themselves, yet transform everything they touch. Just like in food, when leadership is missing its salt, no amount of garnish can save it. And perhaps that’s why stories return to us at unexpected moments and remind us of what truly matters.

    What Salt Looks Like in Leadership

    In leadership, salt often shows up in moments that are uncomfortable and unpopular. It is the tough call that not everyone agrees with, but which protects the long-term health of the organisation. It means speaking up in sensitive situations. It involves calling out behaviours that are misaligned with values. Silence may be easier, but speaking up is necessary. It is choosing fairness over favour, truth over convenience, and clarity over temporary harmony.

    These actions rarely win applause in the moment. In fact, leaders who bring this kind of salt are often described as difficult, too direct, or not very likeable. Yet, over time, they are remembered as dependable, credible, and deeply respected.

    Think of leaders who are not universally liked because they refuse to dilute the truth. They are leaders who take principled stands, make unpopular decisions, or hold the line when pressure mounts. They may not be warm or charismatic. However, they create organisations that endure. They foster cultures that are clear. They build teams that trust the ground they stand on.

    Salt in leadership is not about being harsh. It is about being honest. Used well, it doesn’t overpower but brings balance.

    A Lesson from the Kitchen: Gajar ka Halwa

    There’s a reason I often think about leadership through food. It’s perhaps not a coincidence that gajar ka halwa comes to mind now. This is exactly the season for it. Slow-cooked carrots, milk, ghee, sugar, cardamom, nuts – each ingredient matters. But there is one addition that surprises people when they hear it for the first time.

    A small pinch of salt.

    Not enough to be tasted on its own. Just enough to sharpen the sweetness, deepen the richness, and bring all the flavours together.

    Without it, the halwa is still good, but something feels missing.

    Gajar ka Halwa (Serves 4–6)

    Ingredients

    • 1 kg red carrots, grated
    • 1 litre full-cream milk
    • 4–5 tbsp ghee
    • ¾ cup sugar (adjust to taste)
    • ½ tsp cardamom powder
    • A handful of cashews and raisins
    • A small pinch of salt

    Method

    1. Heat 3 tbsp ghee in a heavy-bottomed pan. Add grated carrots and sauté for 5–7 minutes until aromatic.
    2. Add milk and cook on medium heat, stirring occasionally, until the milk reduces and the mixture thickens.
    3. Add sugar and continue cooking until the halwa comes together and leaves the sides of the pan.
    4. Stir in cardamom powder and the remaining ghee.
    5. Add cashews and raisins, lightly roasted.
    6. Finally, add a small pinch of salt, mix well, and turn off the heat.

    Serve it hot or cold – preferably hot, with a scoop of Vanilla Ice cream.

    Leadership Spice Reflection

    Just like in the halwa, the salt will not announce itself, but you will taste the difference. Leadership works the same way.

    You can have vision, strategy, empathy, and influence. But without the salt – truth, courage, and moral clarity, the leadership lacks depth.

    The question worth asking is not whether you will add salt to your leadership, but when it will matter most.

  • Heat, Patience, and Trust – Leadership Wisdom from Goan Fish Curry

    I was making goan fish curry the other day – one of my favorites. It’s a very simple recipe, yet a bit tricky. The gravy started thickening slowly, the aroma of curry leaves, garlic, and ground spices filling the kitchen. The curry was looking rich with the color of turmeric and the tang of kokum. It looked ready, but I paused. Should I add the fish now? Because if I add the fish too early, it’ll break.
    And if I let it wait too long, it won’t soak in the flavor.

    That one decision of when to add the fish, decides everything.

    The perfect Goan curry isn’t just about the ingredients. It’s about timing, temperature, and trust. You need to sense when the base is ready. Know when the heat should lower. Recognize when to leave things untouched. Understand when to simply wait.

    The Leadership Parallel

    It reminded me that Leadership, like a well-made Goan fish curry, is a dance between action and restraint.

    For example, giving feedback is never easy, especially when it is developmental or sensitive. Over the years, I’ve realized that the timing makes the difference between feedback that transforms and feedback that tears down. I’ve learned it the hard way – through trial, reflection, and a few burns in the process.

    I have often encountered situations where I had to give feedback to underperformers. They were already demotivated and defensive. I could have delivered it straight and finished it. However, I believe it’s important to first spend a little time understanding their fears. It’s also crucial to recognize their triggers. That said, the feedback must be given promptly. Allow just enough time for the ‘gravy’ to settle before adding the ‘fish.’ This way, it lands softly without being delayed too long. This approach has worked well for me and for the receivers, helping the feedback land constructively and without defensiveness.

    We often assume high performers don’t need feedback. If they do need it, we think giving feedback to them is easy. After all, they’re results-oriented and usually receptive. But even the best ingredients can be ruined if the timing is off. A fish curry needs the freshest fish and spices to absorb the flavors. They cannot be left out too long or added too early. Feedback also needs the right moment. I faced this with a brilliant team member whose results were stellar but whose arrogance was slowly alienating the team. The temptation was to avoid the tough conversation for fear of demotivating them. I waited for the right moment and when the trust was high, I spoke honestly about attitude. It wasn’t easy, but it worked. The team noticed the shift. So did the individual.

    Sensing Readiness – Up, Down, and Across

    For me, giving feedback has never been only downward. Many a times, I had to do that upward as well. And for both, timing and pre preparation is critical. I remember two very distinct moments with senior leaders. One would routinely arrive late to meetings, keeping the team waiting. Another would stay glued to their laptop or mobile during appraisal discussions. They were my bosses. Most of us would have quietly accepted this. But I chose a different approach.

    For the late-coming, I let it slide a couple of times. It was like allowing a new spice to mingle in the pot before deciding if the flavor works. I then chose to handle the habit of arriving late gently. I said, “In our workshops, lateness comes with chocolate duties.” Consider this your friendly reminder to bring the premium ones if you’re late again!” Delivered with humor, the message was clear and well-received, and punctuality and communication improved tremendously.

    In the midst of a meeting with the “glued-to-device” boss, I paused once. I spoke respectfully but firmly. I said, “I’ll continue when you can give this conversation your full attention.” This matters to me. Uncomfortable, but honest. I avoided gossiping or complaining about this to anyone. As a result, I earned their respect. That person also ensured the behavior didn’t happen again, not just with me, but with anyone else.

    Much like preparing a Goan fish curry, leadership requires timing, tact, and the right balance. You don’t dump all the spices in at once. You let flavors develop. You adjust and then serve at the right temperature. Addressing sensitive issues works the same way. You need a little patience. The right seasoning of humor and honesty is also important. The result is a team that respects both the process and the person leading it.

    Balancing Friendship and Leadership

    Timing isn’t just about feedback or heat; it’s also about relationships. Over the years, I’ve learned how crucial it is to balance friendship with accountability. I’ve had bosses who were also good friends. They taught me that closeness can coexist with high expectations. This balance is possible only if boundaries are clear.

    I apply the same principle with my own teams. I cultivate trust, camaraderie, and warmth. At the same time, I make it crystal clear that friendship does not mean leniency. Expectations, performance, and accountability still come first.

    Sometimes, people test that boundary, perhaps unintentionally. When it happens, timing is key. That’s the time to give instant, clear feedback. Do this not in anger, but in a way that re-establishes the boundary. This manages expectations. By addressing it immediately, both the relationship and the results are preserved.

    Knowing when to be approachable and when to be firm requires balance. It’s like adding the fish at just the right moment in a Goan curry. If added too early or too late, it could break. Handled with care and timing, it strengthens the dish – and the team.

    Respecting Fragility and Building Trust

    Fish is delicate. Handle it too much, and it falls apart.

    So are people.

    True leadership is not about constant stirring. It is about creating safety. Even in the heat, this safety allows people to hold their shape. A team thrives because of trust. Its strength lies in the quiet confidence that their leader knows when to step back.

    Once you add the fish, you don’t stir. You let it rest, letting the flavors blend and settle.
    Leaders, too, must resist the urge to “keep checking.” Let trust do its work.

    Goan Fish Curry Recipe

    Serves: 4 | Prep Time: 15 mins | Cook Time: 20 mins

    Ingredients:

    • 500g firm white fish (like kingfish, pomfret, or seer) – cut into chunks
    • 2 tbsp coconut oil
    • 1 large onion, finely chopped
    • 1 tsp mustard seeds
    • 2-3 curry leaves
    • 2 cloves garlic, minced
    • 1-inch ginger, minced
    • 2 green chilies, slit
    • 1 tsp turmeric powder
    • 1 tbsp red chili powder (adjust to taste)
    • 2 tsp coriander powder
    • 1 cup coconut milk (thick)
    • 1 cup water
    • 1 tbsp tamarind paste or 3-4 kokum petals
    • Salt to taste
    • Fresh coriander leaves for garnish

    Method:

    1. Prep the Fish:
      • Rinse and pat dry the fish pieces.
      • Lightly marinate with a pinch of turmeric and salt. Set aside.
    2. Heat the Base:
      • In a deep pan, heat coconut oil over medium heat.
      • Add mustard seeds; when they splutter, add curry leaves and sauté briefly.
      • Add onions and sauté until golden brown.
    3. Build the Curry:
      • Add garlic, ginger, and green chilies. Cook until aromatic.
      • Stir in turmeric, chili powder, and coriander powder. Cook for 30-60 seconds.
    4. Add Liquids:
      • Pour in coconut milk and water. Mix well.
      • Add tamarind paste or kokum, and salt. Simmer for 5-7 minutes.
    5. The Critical Moment: Adding the Fish:
      • Lower the heat to medium-low.
      • Gently slide in the fish pieces – do not stir aggressively.
      • Cover and cook for 7-10 minutes, until the fish is just cooked and holds its shape. Timing is crucial – overcooking will make the fish break, undercooking will leave it raw.
    6. Finish:
      • Taste and adjust salt or tamarind.
      • Garnish with fresh coriander leaves. Serve hot with steamed rice.

    The Quiet Mastery of Timing

    The best leaders, like the best chefs, don’t chase perfection through force. They know when to turn up the heat, when to reduce the flame, and when to simply let things be.

    Leadership, like a Goan curry, involves more than just doing things right. It’s also about doing them at the right time.

    Heat gives flavor. Patience gives depth. And trust – the invisible ingredient, holds it all together.


  • Sizzle and Serve: Leadership Lessons from a Perfectly Seared Steak

    I would have been a chef if I were not a leadership and management consultant. But here I am – relating my cooking experience to leadership stories. Just like cooking requires timing, patience, preparation, consistency and even courage to try things differently, so does good leadership. And just like a perfectly seared steak, great leadership starts with handling heat without losing composure. It involves knowing when to act and bringing out the best in your team.

    Think of the sizzle of a steak hitting a hot pan. That first hiss is sharp but essential, and makes you notice because it is the begining of a slow transformation. Just like in leadership, it marks the moment when change begins to stir. It captures attention and signals that true transformation is just starting. That “heat” is where flavor develops. In leadership, the heat comes from challenging conversations. It also arises during high-pressure projects or moments where stakes are high. How you handle these situations determines the outcome.

    Facing the Heat – Courage in Leadership

    I remember my catering college days. It was when I first seared the meat. I got hot oil drops on my hand. Searing meat requires courage and tact. You place it on a smoking hot pan. You know it could burn if you’re careless. But then, it’s necessary for flavor. Leadership is similar. The situations that make us uncomfortable but leads us to growth – for ourselves and our teams.

    I remember a high-performing team member I worked with. He was brilliant at his job. However, he had a flaw. He would frequently lose his temper with the team members. I could have avoided addressing this. I worried about conflict or hurting the relationship. Instead, I chose to confront it head-on. Through structured feedback, candid conversations, and ongoing coaching over several months, he transformed. Not only did he control his temper, but he also became a source of inspiration for the team. Just like searing meat is crucial to retain the flavors. It is also important to not avoid the heat in leadership. It’s about stepping into it with empathy, clarity, and resolve. The heat may be uncomfortable but is essential for the end result.

    Knowing When to Act – Timing Matters

    Even the best chef knows that timing is everything. Over-searing a steak leaves it dry and tough. Under-searing leaves it bland. Similarly, leadership requires a sense of timing – knowing when to intervene and when to step back.

    One of my managers, struggled with check-ins because a team member would cry whenever expectations were discussed. Her instinct was often to avoid confrontation or rush the conversation. She approached me for help as she found it very difficult to handle those emotional outbursts. I joined the next check-in, allowing the emotions to surface, giving the team member space to process feelings. We rescheduled when needed, repeating this process until the dynamic changed. Eventually, the team member no longer cried during check-ins, and discussions became constructive.

    In leadership, timing isn’t just about speed. It’s about reading the room and understanding emotions. It’s also about choosing the right moment to act. Just as a steak needs the perfect sear, teams need intervention at the right time to bring out their best.

    Patience – Letting Growth Develop

    A steak needs time on the pan to develop that beautiful crust. Even on high heat, you can’t rush it. Leadership is no different. Growth in people, processes, or projects requires a lot of patience to get the desired results.

    One of my hires initially struggled with her role. She had potential, but the results weren’t immediate. She was on the verge of quitting and even my manager was not convinced that she could perform as expected. But I coached her, provided feedback, and gave her the space to learn. Over months, she grew into one of the team’s best performers, eventually earning an award for excellence.

    Leadership requires the patience to nurture potential, to trust the process, and to resist the temptation of instant results. The crust, the flavor, the transformation – all need time and care.

    Preparation – Setting the Stage for Success

    A chef doesn’t simply toss raw meat onto a hot pan. The meat is seasoned, the pan preheated, the ingredients ready. In leadership, preparation is equally critical.

    Some of my most successful client calls, particularly those involving escalations, went smoothly because of careful preparation. Aligning with the team beforehand made the difference. Anticipating potential objections helped. Rehearsing responses contributed to transforming a tense call into a successful resolution. Preparation builds confidence, prevents mistakes, and ensures leadership appears seamless even under pressure.

    Consistency – The Long-Term Sear

    Consistency is often overlooked but is vital for both chefs and leaders. A steak cooked inconsistently won’t satisfy. Leadership requires habits and repeated actions that build trust and engagement over time.

    During COVID, when all connection was virtual, I introduced a weekly “fun time” with my team. It gave all of us a chance to unwind, connect, and share experiences. I did this consistently for years. It became a ritual that strengthened team morale, engagement, and trust. This happened even when we couldn’t meet physically. Leadership isn’t about occasional brilliance; it’s about consistent care, guidance, and attention over time.

    The Steak Recipe – Leadership on Your Plate

    To bring the metaphor to life, here’s a recipe for a perfectly seared steak with mushroom sauce. Enjoy it while reflecting on leadership lessons and I’m sure you’ll see the parallels in every step.

    Ingredients:

    • 2 ribeye or sirloin steaks (1–1.5 inches thick)
    • Salt and freshly ground black pepper
    • 2 tbsp olive oil
    • 2 tbsp butter
    • 1 cup sliced mushrooms
    • 1 clove garlic, minced
    • ½ cup heavy cream
    • 1 tsp Dijon mustard
    • Fresh thyme (optional)

    Instructions:

    1. Prep the steaks: Pat dry with paper towels. Season generously with salt and pepper on both sides. Let them sit at room temperature for 20–30 minutes.
    2. Sear the steaks: Heat a heavy skillet over high heat. Add olive oil. Once shimmering, place the steaks in the pan. Sear 3–4 minutes per side for medium-rare, adjusting for thickness. Avoid moving the steaks too much.
    3. Rest: Remove steaks and let them rest for 5–10 minutes to retain juices.
    4. Make the mushroom sauce: In the same pan, melt butter. Add garlic and mushrooms; sauté until golden. Stir in cream, mustard, and thyme. Cook until slightly thickened. Season to taste.
    5. Serve: Pour mushroom sauce over steaks and enjoy.

    Reflection

    Leadership, like cooking, is an art and a science. You can’t skip the sear. The heat, the timing, the patience, the preparation, and the consistency as all of these matter. Handle the heat with courage, intervene with good timing, nurture growth patiently, prepare thoroughly, and act consistently.

    When you lead like a chef, the results are flavorful, memorable, and lasting. Just like a perfectly seared steak, great leadership leaves a lasting impression. This impact is both on the plate and on the people you lead.

  • Yoga, Leadership, and the Art of Letting Go

    When Leadership Met the Mat

    Through my years of working with leaders across industries, I have observed one truth. The most grounded leaders do not always have the loudest voices. They often lack the strongest strategies. They have learned the subtle art of being still while in motion. They lead with awareness rather than anxiety.

    When I joined a 7-day yoga camp some years ago, I was surprised. The experience mirrored the lessons I’ve been teaching and witnessing in boardrooms. Yet, as the days unfolded, I found myself rediscovering leadership through asana and pranayama.

    Lesson 1: Watching the Breath, Watching the Mind

    Our mornings in the camp started at 6.00 am with the activity of focusing on the breath and reflecting on the thought of the day. Sounds simple, but for me, it was difficult to focus. The mind is not in control and keeps wandering. I was not sure if I was doing it right and whether I was aligned or not. It reminded me so much of how I often entered meetings, mentally rehearsing, over-preparing, striving to get everything “right.”

    Our instructor’s calm voice broke the chatter:

    “Just watch your breath. Don’t control it – just notice it.”

    That single instruction shifted something inside me. Over the next few days, I observed how the breath reflects our leadership energy. When we push too hard, it becomes shallow and strained. When we allow flow, it deepens, naturally balancing effort with ease.

    This activity reminded me of a senior leader I once coached. Brilliant, driven, and deeply committed but often exhausted. His need for control made him breathe (and lead) in short, sharp bursts. Over time, as he practiced “pausing before reacting,” he found a rhythm. This rhythm transformed his team’s morale. It also improved his peace of mind.

    My takeaway from this is that leadership is so much like yoga. It’s about staying present, letting go of control, and trusting the process enough to let things flow.

    Lesson 2: Ego, Comparison, and the Grace of Falling

    We moved into the difficult asanas. I caught myself comparing to see who seemed more flexible. I also checked to see who held their balance longer. It’s such a human thing, this quiet habit of measuring ourselves against others. And the instant I became aware of it, my own balance wavered.

    This experience was humbling yet familiar. In leadership, ego often creeps in quietly. It happens through the need to prove, to outperform, and to be seen. I’ve seen remarkable leaders stumble when comparison replaces curiosity.

    In one of my training sessions with a group, one of the speakers who was a very senior leader with that organization said something that has stayed with me:

    “The moment I stopped competing with my peers and started learning from them, I became lighter.”

    Yoga reminded me that falling out of balance isn’t failure. It’s awareness that creeps in softly, inviting curiosity instead of judgement. This helps us to feel, breathe, and realign. The ego resists, but awareness restores.

    As Daisaku Ikeda beautifully says:

    A profound change in just one person can influence an entire society. This individual transformation can lead to a societal shift.

    That revolution, whether on the mat or in leadership, begins when we let go of ego. It starts as we breathe into humility.

    Lesson 3: From the Mat to the Meeting Room

    By the end of the camp, a small ritual of taking three slow breaths had become second nature to me. Whether it was before any conversation or decision, I paused to take three slow breaths. This helped clarity set in and replace the clutter. I realized yoga hadn’t just strengthened my body; it had expanded my capacity to listen. I was always a good listener. Or so I thought. Now I have started listening better. I listen not only to others but to myself.

    The best leaders I’ve known take a mindful breath before they speak. They observe before they act. They embody steadiness and ease in every posture, and every situation.

    Satvik Recipe: Lauki Kofta in Palak Gravy

    After seven days of early mornings, gentle satvik meals, and quiet introspection, I came home with a memory. I am sharing a nice satvik lauki kofta recipe below. This Satvik Lauki Kofta in Palak Gravy is light and grounding. It is completely free of onion and garlic. It is perfect after a day of mindful practice.

    Ingredients

    For Koftas:

    • 1 medium bottle gourd (lauki), peeled and grated
    • 2 tbsp besan (gram flour)
    • Salt to taste (or rock salt for satvik cooking)
    • A pinch of turmeric and cumin powder
    • 1 tsp ghee (for brushing or shallow frying)

    For Palak Gravy:

    • Two cups spinach leaves (blanched and blended)
    • 1 tsp ghee
    • ½ tsp cumin seeds
    • 1 tsp grated ginger
    • ½ tsp coriander powder
    • ½ tsp aamchur powder
    • ¼ tsp garam masala
    • Salt to taste

    Method

    1. Make Koftas: Squeeze out extra water from grated lauki. Mix with besan, salt, and spices. Shape into small balls and bake, air-fry, or shallow fry in ghee until golden.
    2. Prepare Gravy: Heat ghee, add cumin and ginger. Add spinach puree and spices. Simmer gently for 5–7 minutes.
    3. Combine: Add koftas to gravy just before serving. Garnish with a swirl of fresh cream or coconut milk.

    Serve with steamed rice or phulka. It’s delicious, simple, sattvic, and soul-soothing.

    Closing Reflection

    Both yoga and leadership are lifelong practices. Each day, we’re invited to stretch – not just our bodies, but our minds, our patience, and our ego boundaries.

    The more I practice, the more I see that leadership, like yoga, isn’t about perfection. It’s about presence. Growth happens not when everything goes smoothly, but when we stay centered amid the stretch and the strain. And when we’re truly present, we create space for others to rise, connect, and bring their best selves forward.

    After a long day of leading and learning, a bowl of satvik food may help us. It can lead us back to that calm center, one mindful bite at a time.

  • Integrity in Leadership: Like Saffron in Biryani

    When I think of integrity in leadership, the first image that comes to mind is saffron in biryani.

    It’s not the loudest ingredient. It doesn’t scream for attention like fried onions or whole spices. But it’s the one that brings depth, color, and an unmistakable aroma. Without it, the biryani lacks its soul.
    That’s exactly how I see integrity in leadership.

    What does Integrity mean to me?

    For me, integrity is about doing the right thing even when no one is watching.
    It’s about being anchored to your values, even when the waters are choppy, especially then. It’s easy to speak of integrity in presentations or value statements. But real integrity shows up in action, in the quiet corners of decision-making, in moments when shortcuts are tempting.

    Personal Stories that have stayed with me

    One story my husband shared about integrity goes back to the 1980s, from his time in the hotel industry. His boss would often show up unannounced after hours. He was not there to act as a supervisor looking for faults. Instead, he was there as a human leader. He would check whether the people doing night shift had eaten, taken breaks, and had everything they needed. His presence wasn’t performative; it came from genuine care and integrity. He didn’t do it for show but he did it simply because it was the right thing to do.

    Another experience from my childhood that shaped me deeply involves my father, a man of quiet, unshakable principles. Throughout his career, he never accepted gifts from vendors. He didn’t accept personal favors from them either, not even during festivals. Through his actions, he showed me that integrity is the foundation of every relationship and every decision. He taught me that trust and fairness aren’t negotiable, no matter how subtle the temptation may be. Living with integrity shapes not just one’s character, but the legacy one leaves behind.

    I’ve come across leaders I wouldn’t want to be like. I’ve also seen cases where integrity was missing altogether. Leaders who subtly ask for favors, hinting at better appraisals or opportunities in return. It starts off “harmless,” but it chips away at the culture and the credibility of leadership.
    Integrity lost is trust lost, and sometimes, respect never regained. This is like biryani without the saffron. All the effort and ingredients are there. However, the essential flavor is missing. The integrity is missing. The world, unfortunately, has all kinds of leaders. It’s often best to acknowledge the experience. Learn from it, and then let such examples fade from memory.

    Walking the Talk – My Own Test of Integrity

    This value is close to my heart. I have always tried to live by it. One example that stands out has stayed with me. I once had to conduct the performance appraisal of my superboss’s wife, who reported directly to me. Until then, she had always received top ratings. It wasn’t necessarily because she had earned them. It was because no one wanted to ruffle feathers. It would have been easy for me to give her a glowing review and avoid any potential backlash. But that would have meant compromising my principles and the responsibility I was entrusted with. Instead, I provided her with clear and objective feedback. I supported it with specific examples. Then, I invited her to reflect on what rating felt fair based on that feedback. To her credit, she paused, thought it through, and quietly acknowledged that an average rating was appropriate. This is just one of many such moments that have shaped my understanding of integrity in leadership.

    That moment reaffirmed something deep in me. When we lead with fairness and truth, even uncomfortable situations can find graceful outcomes. Integrity doesn’t always have to be loud. Sometimes it’s a quiet conversation behind closed doors, but it speaks volumes.

    Why Integrity Is Like Saffron

    Integrity is to leadership what saffron is to biryani.

    • You don’t need a lot, but you must not leave it out.
    • It doesn’t scream for attention, but its absence is obvious.
    • It adds richness, depth, and a quiet aroma that lifts the entire dish.
    • And it’s precious, because like saffron, integrity is costly. It needs a lot of courage, discipline, and consistency.

    Without saffron, biryani may still look okay. But you know something’s missing. Without integrity, leadership may look successful, but it lacks soul.

    From the Heart to the Plate: Hyderabadi Dum Biryani

    We’re speaking of biryani. Let me tell you about a dish that never fails to warm my soul. It’s one of my favorites – Hyderabadi Dum Biryani.

    Ingredients:

    • 2 cups basmati rice (soaked 30 mins)
    • 500g chicken (marinated)
    • Marinade: Yogurt, ginger-garlic paste, red chili powder, turmeric, garam masala, fried onions, lemon juice, coriander & mint leaves
    • Whole spices: Bay leaf, cinnamon, cloves, cardamom
    • Saffron strands soaked in warm milk
    • Fried onions, mint, coriander, and ghee for layering

    Method:

    1. Marinate the chicken with all ingredients for at least 4 hours (overnight is even better).
    2. Parboil the rice with salt and whole spices till 70% cooked. Drain.
    3. In a heavy-bottomed pot, layer chicken first, then rice.
    4. Add saffron milk, fried onions, mint, coriander, and ghee.
    5. Seal with foil or dough, and cook on dum (low flame) for 30–40 minutes.
    6. Rest for 10 minutes, then serve with raita or mirchi ka salan.

    The saffron lifts the entire dish. Quietly. Powerfully. Just like integrity in leadership.

    Final Stirring Thought

    Integrity isn’t a performance.
    It’s a practice which is often invisible, often inconvenient, but always powerful.

    In a world that sometimes rewards shortcuts, integrity is the long road. But it’s the one that leads you home to yourself.

    And just like the lingering aroma of saffron in biryani, a leader’s integrity leaves a trail. It remains in people’s hearts and memories. It also influences the cultures they build.

  • From Ravan to Reflection: Leading with Awareness (and some Puri, Bhaji and Halwa)

    The first image that comes to mind when we think of Ravan is of a towering figure with ten heads. He was someone defeated by Lord Ram, the embodiment of dharma. But what if we looked beyond the label of “villain”? What if Ravan, the ten-headed king of Lanka, was also a mirror to the complexities that lie within all leaders?

    Dussehra reminds us each year of the triumph of good over evil. But beneath the fiery effigy lies a deeper lesson – one that speaks not just to morality, but to leadership.

    Ravan: The Complex Leader

    Ravan was no ordinary king. He was a brilliant scholar and a master of the Vedas. He was a powerful ruler who transformed Lanka into a golden kingdom. Additionally, he was a fierce devotee of Lord Shiva. His intellect was vast, his ambition boundless. Yet, why do you think that despite his genius, his downfall was inevitable?

    We may find the answer in his ten heads. This may not be just a mythological exaggeration. Instead, it could be a symbol of the many dimensions that reside within every leader.

    Ravan’s ten heads can be seen as symbolic of the various human tendencies. Each of us experiences these at some point. These tendencies range from desire, anger, delusion, greed, pride, jealousy, and ego. They also include intellect, mind, and will. Some of these tendencies, when harnessed and balanced, can fuel vision and strategy. They also support resilience and passion. Others, if left unchecked, can lead to impulsiveness and arrogance. Eventually, they can cause downfall. The true challenge is not to deny these tendencies. Instead, it is to recognize and master the ones that threaten to overpower our better judgment. Ravan’s failure wasn’t in having these traits but it was in letting them overpower his judgment. Just like Ravan, modern leaders carry multiple ‘heads.’ True leadership lies not in suppressing them. It lies in managing them with awareness, humility, and emotional intelligence.

    A Modern-Day Parallel: Two Leaders, Two Outcomes

    Early in my career in the hospitality industry, I had the experience of working under a particularly overly aggressive leader. I consider myself fortunate to have encountered such leadership style. Sometimes witnessing poor leadership firsthand is the best way to understand the kind of leader you don’t want to become. This person was a senior leader who often leveraged position for personal gain, acting without regard for others. Their dictatorial behavior included making obnoxious comments. They also consistently set poor examples. This behavior fostered a toxic culture, leaving the team totally demoralized. No leader’s unchecked arrogance, like Ravana’s, can last forever. Ravana’s power could not endure, and similarly, this person also faced downfall.

    In contrast, I remember another leader equally driven, but deeply reflective. When I first started working with this leader, I felt controlled and dominated. Despite my experience and knowledge, decisions were being made before I could even share a thought. It felt rigid and, honestly, uncomfortable. But instead of letting frustration grow, I chose to have an open conversation. I shared my perspective objectively, unsure of what to expect. I was pleasantly surprised with the positive response and acceptance from that leader. From that point on, everything changed. The environment became collaborative, creative, and energizing. I realized that a leader’s greatness lies not just in their intellect or decisiveness. It is found in their openness to feedback, humility, and willingness to adapt.

    Like Ravana, both leaders had ten heads, but the difference wasn’t in the skill – it was in inner leadership.

    The Real Lesson of Ravan

    Ravan’s downfall began not with the abduction of Sita, but with ego overriding wisdom. He refused to listen and dismissed good counsel. He also let his many heads speak over each other, and ultimately, overpowered his own ability to course-correct. With so many impulses pulling in different directions, he lost the ability to steer himself. Over time, what could have been his strength became his undoing. That’s what makes his story eternally relevant and not just as a myth, but as a leadership metaphor, reminding us that self-awareness and humility matter more than sheer power

    A Dussehra Reflection on My Leadership Journey

    Early in my journey, some voices, like pride or impatience, often dominated. Others, like patience, listening, or reflection, remained quiet. I learned, sometimes the hard way, that leadership is not about silencing parts of myself or others. It is not about asserting power over them. True leadership lies in integration, honoring all aspects of thought, emotion, and perspective. Over time, this reflection has shaped my leadership. It has taught me to lead from awareness rather than impulse. It has shown me to balance strength with empathy. It has guided me to use my abilities wisely rather than excessively.

    This Dussehra, I celebrate not just the victory of good over evil. I also celebrate the ongoing journey of self-mastery, awareness, and conscious leadership. The voices within me work together. They guide my decisions and shape the impact I create.

    Balancing the Flavours (Just like Leadership Traits)

    No Dussehra is complete without food that brings comfort, nostalgia, and joy. While the day symbolizes the triumph of self-mastery, it also brings the warmth of tradition into our homes.
    My personal festive favorite includes puri, aloo sabzi, and sooji ka halwa. The crispy hot puris are puffed to perfection. The dry aloo sabzi has a minty flavor. Of course, suji ka halwa is a must, roasted golden semolina with ghee, cardamom, and ground almonds. Each bring something distinct, but together, they create a complete, comforting experience. It reminds me that in leadership too, you need heat, strength, softness and sweetness, but in the right proportions.

    My Dussehra Recipe: Puri, Aloo Sabzi & Suji ka Halwa

    1. Puri (Fluffy Deep-Fried Bread)

    Ingredients:

    • 2 cups wheat flour
    • Water (as needed to knead)
    • Oil (for deep frying)

    Method:

    1. Mix flour by adding water gradually and knead into a firm, smooth dough.
    2. Rest the dough for 15–20 minutes.
    3. Divide into small balls, roll into discs (not too thin).
    4. Heat oil in a kadhai; once hot, deep-fry each puri until golden and puffed.
    5. Drain on paper towels and serve hot.

    2. Dry Aloo Sabzi

    Ingredients:

    • 4 medium potatoes (boiled and cubed)
    • 1 tbsp oil
    • ½ tsp mustard seeds
    • ½ tsp cumin seeds
    • A pinch of hing (asafoetida)
    • 2 green chilies, chopped
    • Few curry leaves
    • 1 tbsp crushed dried mint leaves
    • Salt, sugar, and turmeric to taste
    • Chopped coriander

    Method:

    1. Heat oil in a pan. Add mustard and cumin seeds along with the curry leaves.
    2. Once they splutter, add hing and green chilies.
    3. Add the boiled potatoes, turmeric, sugar and salt.
    4. Toss gently until coated and slightly crisp.
    5. Garnish with crushed dried mint leaves and coriander.

    3. Suji ka Halwa (Semolina Pudding)

    Ingredients:

    • ½ cup suji (semolina)
    • ¼ cup ghee
    • ½ cup sugar (adjust to taste)
    • 1 cup water
    • 1 cup milk
    • ½ tsp cardamom powder
    • 2 tbsp powdered almonds

    Method:

    1. In a pan, heat ghee and roast semolina/suji on a low flame until golden brown and aromatic.
    2. Add the sugar and keep stirring for a minute.
    3. Slowly pour the water and then the milk into the roasted suji, stirring continuously.
    4. Cook until the mixture thickens and ghee starts to leave the sides.
    5. Add powdered almonds and stir. Serve hot.

    Whether it’s ten heads or ten flavors on a plate, balance is key. Too much of one, and the magic is lost. Just enough, and the result is unforgettable!

  • There are two leadership practices I’ve always stayed true to:
    ✔️ Seeking feedback consistently, and
    ✔️ Taking full ownership when things go wrong.

    In one-on-one check-ins, I invite feedback from my team not as a formality, but as a mirror. Sometimes, the reflection isn’t flattering. For instance, I’ve been told my feedback style can feel too direct, maybe even harsh.

    It wasn’t easy to hear that. But it made me pause and shift. I began using a coaching approach: instead of telling, I started asking. I framed my thoughts as questions, nudging team members to arrive at the insight themselves. It took time, patience, and a lot more preparation, but the shift was powerful. They felt heard. I felt more connected.

    Humility doesn’t mean shrinking. It means showing up with the courage to be wrong, and the willingness to evolve.

    Another space where humility shows up for me is in the face of failure. Whenever a client escalation happened, I never passed the buck. I stood in front, took responsibility, and shielded the team. Not because I had to, but because leadership is about owning the process, not just the praise.

    And speaking of humility…

    What better dish to represent this leadership spice than a bowl of khichdi?
    Humble, forgiving, nourishing and universally comforting. Like humility, it may seem simple on the surface, but it holds depth, balance, and quiet strength.

    Khichdi originated in ancient India and is one of the oldest comfort foods in the subcontinent. Dating back to the Vedic period, it was praised in Ayurvedic texts for being light and nutritious. Made with rice and lentils, it is simple. This simplicity allowed it to evolve across regions. Each region added their own twist, from Bengal’s spiced bhuna khichuri to South India’s pongal. Even the Mughals created richer versions, influencing dishes like biryani. Over time, khichdi became a symbol of unity in diversity, and was even showcased as India’s first “superfood” in 2017.


    The Humble Khichdi Recipe 🥄

    Ingredients:

    • 1/2 cup moong dal (yellow lentils)
    • 1/2 cup rice
    • 1 tbsp ghee (clarified butter)
    • 1/2 tsp cumin seeds
    • 1/4 tsp turmeric powder
    • Salt to taste
    • 1 chopped green chili (optional)
    • A pinch of asafoetida (hing)
    • 3–4 cups water (adjust based on your texture preference)

    Tempering (optional):

    • Ghee
    • A few curry leaves
    • A pinch of red chili powder

    Method:

    1. Wash the rice and dal together and soak for 15–20 minutes.
    2. In a pressure cooker, heat ghee, add cumin seeds, green chili, hing, and turmeric.
    3. Add the soaked rice and dal. Mix well.
    4. Add salt and water. Pressure cook for 3–4 whistles (or cook in an open pot until soft).
    5. Add a final tempering of ghee, curry leaves, and red chili powder if you like.

    Serve hot with papad, pickle, or just a spoonful of curd.

    Leadership, like khichdi, doesn’t need to be fancy to be fulfilling.
    When spiced with humility, it nourishes trust, growth, and resilience

    What’s your favorite spice in leadership?